10 Things That Are Good

As promised, I do have some gumdrops and lollipops...Here are 10 Things That Are Good...

1)  Elise made her second fashion request in almost 11 years.  Twinkle Toes.  (In case you are curious, her first was little fuzzy "ugg" boots.)  I know you are probably wondering why this is a good thing?  Well, first, it shows a personal style preference, indicating that she knows her own mind.  Second, well, she had to put forth a request, and make it understood.  And "hingk hoes" is a little obscure for breakfast conversation...but she totally pulled it off.  (In a related PSA:  putting Twinkle Toes on your kid in the semi dark could easily initiate a seizure.  I felt well beyond weird the other morning, kind of space travel disoriented, but with a little gag-y eye pressure thrown in...)

2) Elise, while making rotten choices with Amelia, is keeping her hands to herself at school this year.  In previous years, it's more 2 no-touch-days in a school week...and this usually doesn't happen for at least 2 weeks into school year.  This year, she is more like 2 touching-days in 2 weeks...and it started with the start of school.  This is amazing.

 

3)  She is not wiping food on friends at school, and only occasionally on her sisters.  HUGE leap forward.

 

4)  She is writing more letters independently and drawing pictures with significantly less coercion. 

 

5)  When she is "writing" letters to people, she is addressing them with people's names...and the first letter is correct, 80% of the time!!  Also her "E"s only have 3 horizontal lines over 60% of the time, unlike her previous "if 3 is good, 9 would be brilliant" rational.

 

6)  She is attempting to communicate whole ideas, experiences, and desires.  I grant you, her speech is garbled at best, and it is still very elementary, but she is striking out past 2 word phrases.  I would like to credit her speech therapists with using her interests in speech therapy instead of sticking to "speech therapy protocol" and thinking outside Dolch words.  Pam and Kathleen, y'all ROCK!!

 

7)  I have started having my girls pick out clothes the night before and put them on the floor laid out like people.  She know what she needs to make a "school person", even if she cannot lay it out smoothly...AND she sticks to the decision in the morning.  BOTH huge leaps!!!

 

8)  She mostly takes her meds without spitting them out.  I say mostly, because there are still some rather sticky days, but she is getting waaaay better!!

 

9)  She is all about negotiations.  Now.  This is driving me bat crazy right now...but it is seriously high level thinking.  She is always arguing with me, that "Daddy say 'YES'!"  (Usually I also get the full body attitude wiggle with it!)  When both of us know, that a) it isn't so and b) he was not around to be asked.  But she is ALL her daddy's girl in the world of negotiations.  She will find every loop hole in a phrase.  She will put up insane options and then back them down to ludicrous, hoping that I will fall for the bait-and-switch as proportionally reasonable. 

 

10)  She is requesting hugs and kisses.  Again, I realize this is not huge to most kids, but for Elise, she used to stand and grunt with her hands out.  Now she demands "Kiss me, please!"  and "Need hug, please!"  And I always comply, even as she invades my personal space and I can't cook for her standing one millimeter outside of my skin.  Because, really, who couldn't use more love?

 

 

 

 



31 for 21: Pictures and Trying things.

I am cheating a tiny bit today, but they are all HUGE developmental and sensory growth markers for Elise...so bear with me and celebrate with me.

About 2 weeks ago, Elise climbed into the bed of Ethan's truck, which she has done only once before.  Which was a nice little bit of bravery and motor planning.

 

Which was then followed by lots of yelling for help to get her out.  I refused and talked her out of the bed of the truck with instructions and minimal touching so she could gauge which body parts needed to move, and to where. 

 

The fact that she got out on her own was pretty huge.  A gigantic step in Gross Motor Skills...let me tell you!!!

 

Then, yesterday, we went to a Family Fun Day for a friend of ours that is a State House Representative.  This has involved a host of sensory-difficult things for Elise and Charlotte in the past.  But Elise demonstrated both her speech leaps and her sensory defensiveness growth this year. 

 

 

First, she stood in line, on her own, and requested a snow cone, and specified a color.

 

 

Then she decided that it was NOT ice cream and refused to eat it.  She gagged a little, but she tried to sell me on it...telling me that she got it for me, and I was to eat it!

 

She then ran off, and sweet talked some different girls into giving her some popcorn.  Which was MUCH more delicious than the weird "green ice, blah!".

 

 

She happily gave some bread to some goats and pigs at the petting zoo...but gave them a wide birth...unlike the horse who declined her offer of bread through the window of his stall.

 

 





Mind-blowingly, she requested face-painting, and not just any old face-painting, FULL FACE. And she left it on for about 20 minutes before she started itching her nose...and about an hour before she started scrubbing it off onto her shirt tail.

 

She answered questions and sat still for the whole thing.  WOW!!

 

She then topped off her day with hopping around in a bounce house...but took turns with her sister and a boy about her age...

 

 

And then today, lest I get too excited and comfy...she played throw-the-rocks-in-the-puddle with her sisters and when Amelia got mud on her hand, Elise gagged so much she kicked her and had to hide...so...you know...BUT, I would like to remember and focus on the turn taking and giggling shared....It was beautiful!!!

 

 

 

And so I shall.

 

 

This weekend was FULL of giant steps...And so I choose to celebrate them...and remember the snapshots of "normal"...they were really delicious...and you have no idea how hard we have had to work for them!!!!  Almost 10 years of Occupational, Physical, Speech, and Sensory therapy PAID OFF, Baby!!!!!  Can I get a "Woot, WOOT!"?!?!?!





31 for 21: Another Dirty Job: The Tooth Fairy

Because I discovered that it is ALSO Sensory Processing Awareness Month, I thought I'd tell a fun bizarre Elise story...

Elise pulled out her loose tooth last Tuesday (that I had NO idea was loose as she won't let anyone in her mouth, EVAH) and she did NOT throw it away in the trash or hock it across the room...she's growing up!!!  (The last 3 she's lost have not even made it home.)  Now, if only she will let us put it under her pillow...hahahaha!!

She ripped the tooth at question out of her head while at the white board at school, with a howl of triumph held it high and shouted:  "The TOOF FAIWY is coming TONIGHT!!!"

However, the idea of the tooth touching her pillow made her gag...no kidding.  She retched and refused to house it...she ultimately refused to even let that "nasty" thing even in her room.

The funny thing?  She told everyone at school that the tooth fairy came and left her some money.  Not so true.

The next day, I hunted down a little organza gift bag, and we put the tooth in there and hooked it on the side of her bed...when bedtime came and Elise saw that it was safely ensconced in a bio hazard-proof container, she allowed it under her pillow. 

As she has no real concept of money and it's usefulness, (usually she carries it around in paper towels and gives it to her money savvy sister) she got a couple of quarters and a doll shirt for one of her Activity Support Friends.  Baby Pizza won the lottery and is now sporting an Alvin and the Chipmunks shirt...and, as usual, Amelia is 50 cents richer, and it was a kleenex this time.

:)

31 for 21: #30 The 21 Snapshot

Last year, I stole an idea from a friend and I'm revisiting it again this year...I was too tired to think last night, so I'm putting up two posts today to make up for it! 

Last year my friend over at Sunflower Stories posted 21 facts about her boy...and has for several years...and I loved it so much I decided to do the same every year, whether or not I did the 31 for 21 again!!

HERE is last year's!

And for this year:

1)  Elise is in love with wolves and pigs again this year....but we've added a total obsession with horses, too!

2)  Her favorite movies and shows this year are:  Shrek, Wall-E, Up, Shaun the Sheep, Wallace and Gromit, Mr. Bean, iCarly, and anything involving Christmas...bizarrely enough, it seems her favorites are heavily weighted to shows that rely on physical expression rather than dialogue...

3)  We have seriously cut into her cracker habit...but she still lives for crackers and popcorn...

4)  She likes to wad herself up and sleep in a ball...

5)  She still loves to have her Care Bears all lined up...but she now will shake things up and make her bears or elephant wear Build-a-Bear t-shirts...Believe it or not, this is a serious growth and maturity indicator!  :)

6)  This year, we decided to play on her techie super abilities, and utilize all the apps that are working communication miracles, and ask for donations from her grandparents and a Kindle Fire was ordered for her birthday...  I would totally tell you what I think of it, but it doesn't come out until middle of November...so, I'll keep you updated!  ;)

7)  Elise is playing more independently more often.  Her American Girl, Kit, gets to have some serious adventures.  She loves to play with her plastic animal horde.  They have families, friends, and actually have conversations now!  She really is growing!

8)  She can read simple sentences on her own.  Her independence is growing with her vocabulary.

9)  With her growing ability to read on her own, she still enjoys to "read" books without pictures.  She pores over them, enchanted with the idea of words and their potential.

10)  Elise has enjoyed listening to the dramatized audio books this year.  This is HUGE people!  She is "getting" the story behind independent words, with no animation or pictures.

11)  This year Elise can actually ENJOY the pool!!  She spent the entire summer enjoying swimming!!!  Well, paddling around with her life-jacket...but for the past 8 years we've had nothing but screaming and wailing...so this new found actual enjoyment of the pool??  SO AWESOME!!!!

12)  She still despises to have her hair brushed.

13)  *See #11*  While she would still adore to never have her hair washed, she is willing to take a bath nowadays!!!  Hoorah!!

14)  She still loves to cook.  LOVES to cook.  With some of the diet changes, we have been successful in finding some food that she will eat other than pizza and crackers.  Can you BELIEVE she likes CURRY???   She enjoys to make rice bowls and is branching out to eat veggies if they are mixed into stuff.  She happily makes and eats pot pies, too.

15)  Second only to any pizza joint, Elise's favorite restaurant is Tin Drum.  (Which is Thai food!) 

16)  For as little as she can communicate verbally, she gets really tickled over some pretty complex humor...

17)  Elise will actually color in a coloring book!!  This is a pretty substantial growth!!  I'm excited about the independence and getting to see her imagination in color!!

18)  She will still do her angry goose step, if she is not pleased about something.  Lately, she is adding a head tilt with a little lizard tongue spit to her repertoire, to express her displeasure, in a more mature display of anger.  (Ha!  Seriously, it is a much more restrained expression this year!!)

19)  *See #18*  Maybe we'll get words next year to lip off over things she is angry about.  I cannot believe this is something I'm praying for...so weird.  Right now we are on the cusp as we occasionally will get a sound effect!  ;)

20)  She still pets our faces when she cuddles with us.  She pets her Care Bears when she snuggles them.  She is still very dependent on sensory input to calm herself.

21)  She still sucks her thumb as her drug of choice when she is tired or stressed...  But thankfully this year she has learned to wipe off her thumb before she touches others.  :)

My girlie is growing up!!!  Love her!!!

31 for 21: #12 Patience

I did not start out to be a patient person. I am a do-er. I don't like to sit and wait. I crochet, I do not knit, because it takes FOREVER. I prefer to read, because I can read faster than the audio books can dole it out for me. I like to do individual sports, because I do not have to wait on someone else...

I had a temper unlike anything you have ever seen. I got into verbal fights faster than the proverbial gauntlet hitting the ground. I shouted at teachers (please don't tell my kids). I rankled under the tiniest wait. I would drive the long way around slow traffic, even if it took longer, because at least I was moving and I liked to feel in control.

Then I had my son. I slowed down a little, but all in all, he was happy to go along for the ride. So I had to learn to make some adjustments, but the speed didn't have to change much. He was SO big SO fast and very easy going. He slept through the night, hit all the developmental milestones, and was a Good Baby.

Then I had Elise.

Enter the mind-numbing oppression of the wait in a doctor's office. If you don't have patience, go deal with medical testing, the emergency room, and test results...you will either grow a mammoth lot of patience or your brain will explode. Then add complications and developmental delays and you will be stretched even more. Then, add a weird pre-cancerous condition that the doctors tell you WILL develop into cancer, they just don't know when, and sit that one out for a full year....Then once cancer presents, you are hit with the fact that there is never enough time...and waiting doesn't seem so bad.

In some ways having a child with developmental delays and mental delays is like running in nightmares where you run and run and run and don't seem to get anywhere...you are exhausted, but your feet are caught in mud and you can get no traction. In this situation, you have two choices. You can buck and say that this is not what you had planned for your life, and continue to run at your previous pace, wallowing and thrashing in the mud. Or you can celebrate the progression of tiny baby steps, and slow down your efforts such that you don't pass out from the strain, and actually make some progress.

I have been blessed by being in a Bible Study by Beth Moore on Esther. Today she made the point that "Our culture is training us in impatience."

We have microwaves, convection ovens, high speed internet, instant replay functions on out TV's, instant stream videos on our computers, drive through restaurants....the list can go on and on...and while these are very nice, they don't help you exercise your patience.

We can find out if our children will have health issues, and we don't even have to suffer that, resulting in more than 90% of babies suspected of having Down Syndrome being aborted (and who knows how many of other disabilities being aborted!) because it is not the life their parents had chosen to live...

I would not have chosen to grow this much patience, but I am very aware of the blessing that it is. I have grown to the point where I really feel sorry for young, crazy Me that sped through so fast that I missed SO much fun and really cool things in life. I didn't truly appreciate anything enough. I am sure that I will continue to be stretched and tested by God, but I am equally sure He will show me some even more amazing things. Who knows, I may even be able to take up knitting.