I promise you that your kids will ask about my kid. It's life. But what's important is that you answer honestly and directly.
You can translate fear and distaste as much as you can foster acceptance and genuine love.
Last weekend I had this conversation with a four-year-old, my friend, "RH". He comes barrelling into my kitchen, stops in front of me, breathing hard, looks me in the eye, and says, "How come Elise is acting like she is 3??"
And I look him in the eye, and tell him that "her heart is 3 or 4, she understands a lot more than she can say, but she is still little on the inside. Tell her if she is being naughty or mean, but be sweet and patient."
He stares at me for a minute, somberly. Then nods his head firmly, and says, "Alright." Continues to stand there looking at me, nods his head determinedly, and turns heel and tears right out the way he came.
They listen. They hear your truth. They remember. They carry it with them for the rest of their lives. DO NOT IGNORE THEM because it is uncomfortable.
Previous explanations:
What I've told my kids
What "They" look like
What Do I Tell My Kid? (alternatives)
Part 1
Part 2
Very well said. Love this, and hope people pay attention to it! You should post it in a FB status for all of your non-Ds friends to read. :-)
ReplyDeleteOh, I do! I'm auto-linked to Facebook. :)
ReplyDelete