Friday, November 18, 2011

Thankful That We Are Not Alone : Tara's Reminders

I was proud to have Tara on as a guest before, HERE and HERE.  She is MY signpost.  And I could never begin to thank her enough for sharing her thoughts and her Boy with me!  I thoroughly enjoy her blog Madness Ensues

She decided to share her heart in a reminder that I think we all need to hear.  Often.

Life is not perfect.  I have a job that doesn’t feel very secure at the moment.  I have a chronic autoimmune disease.  I need to lose weight.  I never seem to have enough money.  I want an extra 2-3 hours each day.  I need a new car.  I don’t get enough sleep.   I’m the single parent of a special needs child  - - life is a tad stressful. 

In the past year, there were moments when I have wanted to kill The Boy.  There were times when I was so frustrated I could barely contain it.  There were instances when I was afraid and felt desperate.   There were times when I felt defeated and times I felt at the mercy of ‘the system’.  And there were days that exhausted me mentally, physically and emotionally.  These are the things for which I am the most grateful - - perhaps not individually, but in totality.

Those of us with children with special needs tend to live in the extreme- at the edges of the norm.  The frustration, anger, desperation, exhaustion and fear make the accomplishments that much sweeter.  The extreme brings me understanding.  It allows me to find laughter in the ridiculous, joy in the mundane and peace in the typical.

Being ‘grateful’ is a constant goal in my life (because sometimes I need the reminder).  Regardless of the little hiccups in the day to day  - our life is so good. I am so thankful for all the opportunities that we have been afforded; especially for the people who make the good so much better and the bad a little more tolerable even when I’m feeling sorry for myself.

I’m thankful for all those in the special needs community who have come before me and lighted the way and to those who are coming up behind me and help me remember where we’ve been and how far we’ve come by telling their stories.  I’m thankful to Tiffany for (once again) giving me the opportunity to tell our story and say what I think in a way I may not have thought about without her.

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